What is not self esteem – the seriesBy
Let us understand what Self-Esteem is not. Self-Esteem is not egotism, self-concept, self-confidence, or self-image. Egotism is self-centeredness, a constant excessive reference to oneself. Self-concept is what you think about your developed and undeveloped areas (skills). Self-confidence is a belief or trust in yourself. Self-image is an imitation or representation of a person. It is not real. It is what you would “like” to present to the world.
Self-Esteem has nothing to do with how much money you have or make, your reputation, the job or career you have, your race, the clothes you wear, your religion, your educational level, your ethnic background, what you own, your sex, where you live, or your zip code. It does not matter how you have focused your life. Self-Esteem is very simple – once again, it is the respect you feel for yourself! Carl Jung said, “Simple things are always the most difficult. In actual life, it requires the greatest discipline to be simple and, the acceptance of oneself is the essence of the problem and the epitome of a whole outlook upon life.”
Many people center their lives around spiritual beliefs. The religions of the world have, at their core, beliefs such as: “All life is scared;” (Hinduism). “Gaining a complete knowledge of the inner self;” (Buddism). “Love thy neighbor as thyself;” (Judiasm/Christianity). In our Western Judao/Christian culture, many of us have not been encouraged to love ourselves. This is often considered egotism and unacceptable. Yet, you first have to love yourself before you can love others. I also personally believe that Self-Esteem is at the core of moving toward your spiritual excellence. The respect you feel for yourself is all you can give to yourself and others. You will learn, grow, have peace of mind, be generous, manage, accept differences and responsibility, have T.U.L. (Total Unconditional Love), acceptance, sell, teach, parent, and act based on your Self-Esteem - the self respect you feel for yourself. Again, you cannot give what you don’t have. You can only give what you have, and nothing more!
Later we will talk about self esteem and happiness.
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