Employer Issue Part 2
By · Comments(cont.)
When the woman went back to work, her employer and critiques at work saw a peace and calmness in her. Her employer and her had been having a relationship (unbeknownst to her boyfriend) and she was now in a new dilemma with chaos – how can she gratefully cut off the unhealthy relationship and still work with him?
Instead of falling back into her old behaviors of ignoring the situation, she chose to “carefront” him (as opposed to confronting). A two hour conference call was set up and we walked through the issues at hand. She disclosed information about her past and set healthy boundaries between the two of them. She walked away with closure of the old relationship and continued in a new business relationship.
Family Business Part 2
By · Comments(continued…)
In order for John to begin to move forward, we needed to create a feeling of safety in order for him to be able to open up to his wife and tell her the truth of the situation and also his true feelings. He was worried because he had never shared his feeling with her before and he did not know how she would respond. I let him know there was a higher percentage of her understanding if he would share the truth versus faking it.
I had him chose to focus on the outcome and to disclose information whether it was good or bad. John wanted his spouse to “get it” and needed to ask her if she had a better idea of if she would support him.
After facilitating a conversation with the two of them, John opened up to his wife and began to work on communication with her and to build a new relationship. John attended the seminar and learned tools that helped him communicate much more effectively and found that people began to respond to him differently because he showed up in a brand new way!
Communication Part 2
By · CommentsAfter your day with friends and family, did you notice any tension in the air? Did you respond with total unconditional love? Have you become aware of the impact your words have on yourself and others? Notice feelings you create within yourself with the words you use and recognize that what you say to others can impact them for a lifetime.
Can you recall the words significant people in your life have said to you — possibly your father, mother, brother, sister, teacher, mentor, manager, friend or spouse? Even if you don’t recall the person who said those words, nonetheless, the words are still with you! Has anyone every used words in an attempt to put you down or make you feel inferior? How were those words expressed and how did you feel in response to them? What words were used by someone who loves you? What did he or she say and what feelings were created in you by those words? Relax and allow whatever comes up to emerge. Write it down. Did you come up with any comments or statements made to you, perhaps even years ago? If you did, then you appreciate the power of words, their impact on you and how long they’ve stayed with you.
My third-grade teacher used to say, “Bill, never talk in front of people because they’ll laugh at you.” As a young boy, I slurred my Ss and Ts and needed to be taught how to speak. The problem, though, was that I interpreted her statement to mean “Bill, shut up! Don’t talk to people. They’ll only laugh at you.” The impact of those words caused me to remain quiet and shy for five years!
Begin to use words that empower others as well as yourself….
