August 12-13 Making It Happen and August 12-16 Move Into Your Greatness.

Once you integrate the ideas in your life all kinds of new things for the better will take place.

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When I was in college, I worked part-time at a leather bag manufacturing company.  Since all the employees knew I was a short term worker, I was frequently told not to work too hard.  They knew they would still be there after I left and did not want a new standard set.

Would you agree many workers need and want more money to satisfy a comfortable lifestyle?  Do you know people who want a promotion?  What can be done to help people acquire the money and promotions they say they want?

The “and then some principle” says that you do what you are paid to do “and then some”.

The next time you call your favorite store, notice the tone of voice of the person who answers the phone.  Observe how long it takes you to get a solution to your challenge.

Hear the words the person uses to communicate with you.  Listen for courtesy, concern, and enthusiasm – that’s the “and then some principle”.  Then focus on your telephone skills.  If someone were evaluating your telephone competence, would they recommend that you be given a raise or a promotion?

Your voice has the power to turn people on or off.   Would your voice cause others to want what you have to offer?  There are three basic voice tones you can choose when conversing.   You can use a soft voice, your normal voice, or a command voice.  Each is acceptable.  The skill is knowing what voice is appropriate for  the situation.  For example; if a person was about to run in front of a car, you would use your command voice to save their life.

When you listen to a speaker, watch television, or go to a movie, notice the power the voice has in creating an  impact on you. Listen to hear the “and then some principle”.

Recall the voices from your past.  Whose voices do you remember?  How did you feel when you listened to them: comfortable or uncomfortable?

Decide now to develop your voice to create a climate of acceptance.  Refuse to yell or scream at anyone.  Soften your voice whenever another person is upset or angry.

For the next week invest in improving your voice and the, watch what happens!

“I now believe in the “and then some  principle” by doing more!”

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Feelings of Self-Esteem can only flourish in an atmosphere where:

       1.  Individual differences are appreciated.

       2.  Communication is open.

       3.  Mistakes are tolerated.

       4.  Rules are flexible.

Robert W. Darvin, founder, president and chief executive officer of Scandinavian Design, Inc., said, “There’s only one thing that counts in a business: building the Self-Esteem of your employees.  Nothing else matters, because what they feel about themselves is what they give to your customers.  If an employee comes to work not liking his job, not feeling respect for himself, you can be sure your customers will go away not liking or feeling good about your company.”

I predict people will be focusing on values that are most important.  They are going to be focusing on building their Self-Esteem and leaving their self-images behind.  They will say their actions are going to be in the direction of personal freedom: taking care of myself; taking care of my family; taking care of my job; taking care of my business; valuing my employees; and most importantly, expressing all the skills I am willing to learn as a result of not comparing myself with anyone else again.  They will be investing those skills in making their communities better by volunteering 10% of their time to the community.  I call this “tithing” their talent.  When this happens, we’re going to have a unique country that will be an example, causing all the countries of the world to say, “We want to learn what you have learned to make America free.” 

Take action now with your Self-Esteem because: 

         What the mind attends to, the mind considers.
         What the mind does not consider, the mind dismisses.
         What the mind continually considers, the mind believes.
         And what the mind believes, the mind eventually does.

Tomorrow we start a new series for you on excellence in your life.

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Value judging is the only thing that will injure or destroy your Self-Esteem.  It is comparing your values with the values of others to find their agreement or disagreement.  Most value judging, about 90% of it, is done on a nonconscious level; you don’t even know you are doing it.  However, you feel it!  Some examples of value judging include: name calling, sarcasm, labeling, controlling, put downs, comparison, criticism and putting people on a pedestal.

You are born with intact Self-Esteem. That is your birthright!  Gradually, your Self-Esteem can be taken away from you by significant others: mothers, fathers, teachers, adults, and peers.  You’ll never reclaim it until you have somebody who is genuinely interested in you.  This individual helps you reclaim your Self-Esteem and make it a skill.  Once you have a skill, no one can take it away from you!

When my father was a boy, he lived in the small town of Sugar Notch, Pennsylvania. From age seven to seventeen his father was on welfare.  For most of his early life he felt like a nobody.  He lived in an unintact Self-Esteem environment.  His mother and father felt like nobodies, and his two sisters felt like nobodies.  Then in the ninth grade, a teacher said, “Bill, I believe you can win the Latin metal.”  Now he never raised his hand in class, never spoke up in groups, yet here was a teacher who believed he could win the Latin metal.  With her help, he did!  Then as a senior in high school, a teacher said, “I believe you can win the public speaking contest.”  He didn’t believe her.  She said, “We’re going to practice, rehearse and drill until you get that skill.”  That was the beginning of his journey of doing qualitative research to discover the answers to these questions: “How come I hurt so much?”  “How come other people hurt so much?” and “What can be done about it?”

When we first started studying Self-Esteem, people ridiculed and abandoned the idea as a “throw-away concept.”  Now, they’re two of the hottest words in the English language because everybody is going through pain.  The economy, relationships, marriages, families, teenagers, baby boomers and senior citizens all giver us great opportunities to see the differences between self-image and Self-Esteem.  Self-Esteem is the bottom line for the future; for family and business relationships.  When you live by self-image, you are guaranteed pain, because you base your life on comparison and value judging.  When you have Self-Esteem, which is the self-respect you feel for yourself, then you have “freedom.”   It does not matter if you are young, or old, or somewhere in between, we all have inside feelings.  No one can know what you are feeling inside unless you let them know.  Things may appear “perfect” on the outside, while you may be “dying” on the inside.    

Tomorrow we will talk about the worlds number one epidemic and what you can do to keep it out of your life.
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For the short term break your next steps into very practical and specific baby steps that are measurable.  Like, I will communicate what I need and want to my spouse and children.  Assess your progress each day, week and month.  Rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 10.  In fact ask others for feedback on how you are doing.

Get an accountability partner, coach or mentor to help you stay on track.

Ask yourself what is the worst that can happen?  If you can live with that then the best that can happen will come to you.  If you want to get past the ordinary you need to intensify your activities so the extraordinary can exist.

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